More and more as the days pass, the temptation to ring or text my Mum in the midst of Christmas preparations is a repetitive blow that winds me every time. The reminder that she’s gone, the reinforcement of the idea I have to face Christmas without her.

You try to carry on,

You do new traditions,

You push through those blackened moments of grief and sadness and try to remember how to act the way you did before and how it makes you feel.

If I / We haven’t wished you happy Christmas or remembered to post that card – relax safe in the knowledge, we’ve paid it forward to Macmillan Cancer Support in her memory instead.