Life of a teacher, wife and procrastination.

16.5.2017 – Is it time to change TeachMarryAvoid?

I’ve been teaching for six years.

I love loved my job.

Yes, I’m very aware that last sentence is in the past tense, which possibly sums up the rest of this blog post.

I am coming to the end of a fixed term contract and I am at the point that I feel that leaving the teaching profession could be the right move for me at the moment. That immortal phrase “A change is as good as a rest” – I haven’t felt rested whilst teaching for quite some time. I could blame it on the conversion to academies but I’m not 100% certain that is the only cause.

I don’t want to become a statistic, but there are many articles like this one in the Guardian here stating that 33% of the teachers quit the state sector within five years of qualifying. I chose to change my role eighteen months ago and worked as an intervention teacher and felt that love for teaching return temporarily. But now, in a post-OFSTED climate, the winds of change are blowing immensely and I’m at a crossroad where I need to decide whether to stay or to change what I do. Abandoning the profession I’ve wanted since my word experience at sixteen, the job I craved after four years of undergraduate and postgraduate studies and I am now beginning to look at the outside world.

I don’t want to disappear from working with children and young people – but the rebel in me is screaming to change what I do completely. I know people play the “but you get great holidays…”  – they are only great if you can afford the inflated prices and if your significant other can book holiday at the same time. But many sections of those holidays are spent tidying your classroom, changing displays, finishing admin tasks you don’t get done during the manic weeks between each one, planning, assessing and factor in the staff meetings as well as assemblies and extra-curricular activities.

7.5.2017 – My Year in Pixels so far…

Feeling sad about the amount of pink 💕and blue 💙 in my life so far this year – hopefully more orange💛, purple💜 and red ❤️ please!

I don’t like that I seem to spiral at the end of the month and scrabble to pick myself up at the beginning of the month. This needs to change!

6.5.2017 – Alphabet Dating – B

Having been so busy recently we’ve really neglected our alphabet dating and have really got to make sure we start to plan in some of the other letters as we haven’t got all that long to get things all done.

The boy decided we needed to go out this weekend and declared a date night. He booked dinner – Byron Burger – one of our faves in town and we decided to give our newest cinema a go and head to Empire. We’ve heard good things and as a couple, we’ve both cancelled our Cineworld cards so the Boy did good and we treated ourselves to a sofa seat after finding Screen 12 in the rabbit warren that is Empire! I was a lucky wife as he sacrificed his time to enable me to sit through my Disney-fueled obsession and finally saw the new version of Beauty and the Beast.

I enjoyed it – I’m not 100% sure I loved the new additions song-wise but as remakes go … I was impressed.

We then came home to continue binge-watching Designated Survivor in bed. So all in all, a successful “B” date.

14.4.2017 – The Little Book of Hygge – Chapter 4 – Food & Drink

Hygge food = a break from healthy living – I feel I embrace this diet 24:7! But communal sharing and comfort food is definitely something I can get on board with. 

Sweets, Cakes and Kagemand or cake man, a danish birthday tradition and let’s not forget Danish pastries. One trend I’ll find hard is hot drinks. 

I like the idea is “slow food” – taking time to prepare and build up flavours that envoke memories. 

6.4.2017 – R&R

The joys of rest and relaxation.

I know some people are keen to jump on the old “Teachers have loads of time off”, you get way more holiday.

I mean ironically today, the court case relating to fines for parents taking children out of school – it has a flip side of the coin. Every holiday I book has to be within school holidays. Term time holidays aren’t an option. This then means that my husband battle with those who have families to book his holidays to spend time with me. I know to some, this might seem like me having a dig. Every situation has multiple sides it will affect.

This week has resulted in me having a hair cut, seeing friends and resting a lot!

Next week is going to circus-filled and husband-filled. After a fab wedding, we get to celebrate tomorrow as well as possibly looking at new houses! Lots of change!

29.3.2017 – Anxiety and Illness

The above image kind of summarises me for the last few weeks. I’ve not really been doing much beyond trying to function at work and keep all the other plates spinning in the hectic life of me. I have a temporary interest in plants and flowers, I’ve been recommended to buy an aloe plant to help me to sleep. (

I’ve re-introduced some friends back into my life which has been interesting and hopefully beneficial in the long run. I’ve also started my EMDR therapy, which has been a curious discovery and has involved many pages in my journal and buying squishy stress relief gadgets to catch and distract my brain. I’ve got my second session this week. Some of it is helping me, other aspects are getting worse which I’m assured they will, before they get better.

We’ve been look around at new houses and have failed to find something we like or get to view them before they go off the market. So we’ll keep looking on that front … we aren’t in a complete hurry to do a move but it would be a balance of exciting and stressful. We just need more space. But it’s making me and Mr M spend more time together looking and deciding which is nice. Had some lovely meals with Mr M and my Dad recently, which has really made me switch on to being thankful for spending time with people, family that I used to take for granted.

Add in an OFSTED inspection – every teacher’s favourite time of their teaching careers. It’s possibly the most nerve-wrecking few days of my career every time we go through it. I have a lot of faith in my school and cannot wait to find out our results over all. This was immensely cushioned thanks to an amazing, thoughtful letter from a friend which totally highlighted my issues and how they thought I was coping, which was nice to hear from someone outside of my immediate life.

I tried to face a social event last weekend… I managed two hours… which I was impressed with as it was with people I didn’t really know and shopping surrounded by Mother’s Day things and knowing that it would be a massive trigger was difficult. But I’m glad I went for a short time, I didn’t spend the whole day celebrating their birthday but with trigger warfare and post-OFSTED dip – I’m kinda proud I managed it at all.

I could write a massive piece on Mother’s Day – But I won’t. It wasn’t my greatest day but I survived. Being asked “What do you like do on Mother’s Day – now you don’t have a Mum?” was possibly a highlight and I was amazed at how well I dealt with it and answered at the time. Needless to say, I’ve avoided said person since the incident and hope that stays that way for a while. Just to point out, even though she’s passed away – I still very much have/had a Mum in my life and always will.

I’ve spent work trying to keep going and knowing the Easter Holiday is soon approaching has helped. I feel so run down and my skin is showing how poorly I feel with loads of breakouts at the moment. I need some R&R and to feel a bit more normal again.

I’ve got Mum’s birthday on Saturday – I’m still not sure how I’m going to mark it… Answers on a postcard, please!

19.3.2017 – The Little Book of Hygge – Chapter 3 – Togetherness

I really like the idea of training your comfort zone to include others … so you can relax around them. I agree with the theory that 3/4 people in a group is optimum. In bigger situations, I panic that I’ve not paid enough attention to people or missed vital things 

Oxytocin – the cuddle hormone – social glue is something I crave but only on my terms. I’m not a hugger but I do love a hug from those I trust. 

The idea of belongingness is definitely one I can relate to. I need to feel safe in a group or in an environment to feel ok in any social situation.

Setting traditions, making memories … knowing that spending time with people doing those things will make things worthwhile.

14.3.2017 – The Little Book of Hygge – Chapter 2 – We need to talk about Hygge

Another interesting chapter this evening – I love the idea of “friolero” as I’m always cold. The term “Cafuné” – the act of tenderly running one’s fingers through the hair of a loved one; I am a sucker for this. Mr M knows with this, it’s an instant relaxant for me and brings me back to earth from whatever panic I’m in.

The dictionary of Hygge has made me think a lot about what I can do and change to make my life more homely. Coming from the word meaning well-being in Norwegian, but links to hugging and embracing. Hygga – to comfort. Referring to the need of Hygge, to create happy children.

The Hygge Manifesto – 10 things we need to create Hygge…

  1. Atmosphere
  2. Presence
  3. Pleasure
  4. Equality
  5. Gratitude
  6. Harmony
  7. Comfort
  8. Truce
  9. Togetherness
  10. Shelter

I look forward to developing these and hopefully seeing the benefits eventually over time…

12.3.2017 – The Little Book of Hygge – Chapter 1 – Light

This book came in my Buddy Box a month or so ago and I haven’t actually read it so I wanted it to dedicate some time to it tonight. 

The first chapter is on light. 

  • My love and adoration for candles specifically Yankee Candles is well known. For some reason, the light of a flickering flame is something that calms and soothes me. 
  • It also talks about photography, a literal painting with light and it has sparked my need to buy a new battery for my film Nikon camera and wanting to get to grips with a manual film SLR camera. It also is giving me an opportunity to talk to my dad about a skill he has that I want him to share with me. We’ve always had photography in common but this could open up a whole new sector of skills to share. 

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