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Teach.Marry.Avoid.

Life of a teacher, wife and procrastination.

12.3.2017 – The Little Book of Hygge – Chapter 1 – Light

This book came in my Buddy Box a month or so ago and I haven’t actually read it so I wanted it to dedicate some time to it tonight. 

The first chapter is on light. 

  • My love and adoration for candles specifically Yankee Candles is well known. For some reason, the light of a flickering flame is something that calms and soothes me. 
  • It also talks about photography, a literal painting with light and it has sparked my need to buy a new battery for my film Nikon camera and wanting to get to grips with a manual film SLR camera. It also is giving me an opportunity to talk to my dad about a skill he has that I want him to share with me. We’ve always had photography in common but this could open up a whole new sector of skills to share. 

11.03.2017 – Husband, Home and Health

This week has been a massive trial.

Not through anyone’s fault but if we can get past everything we’ve had in the last seven months, I know this marriage will last.

My hubby is home. Being without him here was one of the worst experiences I’ve had in a long time. To see him in hospital, on the same wards Mum initially was on before she passed was a horrible and incredibly emotion-fuelled experience. I am truly blessed and know who our friends are from the amounts of texts, offers of support, visitors and listening ears I’ve had to reach out to. We still have more tests to do, in the search of more answers.

This house has been our home together for four and a half years now, and without him here – this house isn’t really like a home. As much as we may complain about each other; making mess, hogging the sofa, etc. but I am actually so glad to have him annoying me 24:7 again. Well, most of the time – you can tell 4 days and 5 nights on a hospital ward with limited social engagement has affected him.

Working whilst knowing he was stuck in a hospital, waiting for results and not being able to be there for him and with him – was without a doubt, horrible. But I know that going back was the best thing for me, as the children I work with are definitely a distraction, which meant that I couldn’t really dwell on how I felt and not being there. It also meant that I reached out to my family and now my extended family since being married.

As well as my husband’s health, I’ve started on a journey relating to my own mental health. Having been diagnosed with PTSD, I was given two options – EMDR (Eye Movement, Desensitisation and Reprocessing) therapy or CBT (Cognitive Behavioural Therapy). Having had CBT in the past, I decided that EMDR might be an interesting option.  In January, I was told I was 21st in a waiting list. I’ve recently been told I am 16th in the list – 6 weeks later. Working on this, I may well not receive any therapy until May / June, which if I’m completely honest isn’t going to be remotely soon enough. I am now looking at options to go privately to receive such treatment quicker if possible.

So today, I have really embraced being home …

  • Had a home-cooked meal.
  • Spent some time sorting my bullet journal.
  • Played on the Xbox with the Husband.
  • Sorted out the house and began Operation:TidyUp as with a hectic week, those mundane chores that get done, need catching up on.
  • Spending the evening watching TV, relaxing and recovering from a busy, stressful week.

06.03.2017 – Rollercoaster Emotions

It truly has been a week of rollercoaster emotions. It’s the only way I can truly describe how I’ve been feeling and how my life has felt throughout the last nine days. I’ve had days where my default mode has been to cry and emotionally be at one of the lowest ebbs I’ve felt in a long time.

Panic attacks have riddled my home and work life and in comparison, I’ve been re-looking at breathing techniques, meditation and anything I can do to try and bring myself out of this. I don’t even know what has really brought me to writing this inane babble about things that to most might seem inconsequential.

My week hasn’t been all bad, I’ve celebrated a milestone birthday with friends, seen one of my longest friends and reminisced about old times, but come crashing back down to earth with a bump. I am already worrying about tomorrow. How I’m going to feel at work, whether I will make it through the day, Can I fix all the problems whizzing around this head of mine?

Looking after my husband is my first priority at the moment as he’s poorly and as for the rest, it will wait! 

26.2.2017 – Friends, Fun, Food and Framlingham

Don’t get me wrong – I adore Ed Sheeran’s music, but I’m not going to be declaring my love for the song or him but more for the place, he’s written it about. (Although … I do particularly adore Castle on the Hill.)

Framlingham holds for me many happy memories and things to adore. 221B breakfasts with friends, wedding preparations and dress fittings in the run up to one of my best friend’s weddings, walking to the Co-Op to fuel snacking appetites and movie marathons. Lately, I’ve been arguing internally about the fantastic phrase “work:life balance” – I really feel I don’t have a work:life balance when it comes to working in the teaching profession.  I always have a to-do list, that I cross one thing off and add two things onto it. I really struggle to understand how people can do this and have a life some weekends.

But this weekend, my husband and I escaped “to the country” to stay with one of my best friends and her husband. To explain this relationship, the females in the relationships are both teachers, we met whilst we were teacher training and kept in contact. We get on like a house on fire and so do our husbands, but no matter how long we spend apart, we get together and pick up exactly where we left of last time.

Walking peacefully around the market, picking up flowers and postcards for my postcrossing habit. Grabbing munchies and food to make sure we have enough supplies to keep going. Watching TV, playing games and genuinely loving being in each others company. Conversation never runs dry and always makes me realise how blessed I am to have such amazing friends and partners-in-crime.

People who have the understanding, care and compassion to recognise how I feel, not to change how they are and to be accepting of me, my mental health and my choices. Feeling very blessed and honoured to have such people in my life.

23.2.2017 – Sloths and Self Care

After battling home because of #StormDoris (I got my usual bus home!), I was home alone and for once, didn’t want to pick up the endless job list created by the teaching profession, life, the universe and everything so I decided to pick up my #buddybox [Found here] (amazingly curated and sent by the Blurt Foundation, who do amazing work in the realms of mental health, specifically depression) and have a rumage as I hadn’t actually had much time to have a look into it since its arrival.

P.S. – At this point, I would like to state I am not paid or asked to promote the Blurt Foundation / The Make Arcade in my post – I am writing about it to highlight the amazing relief, joy and distraction from the busy world we live in and I wish I had found, known and purchased a subscription much, MUCH sooner than I did. I primarily started with one-off buddyboxes but soon found, that it was something I was purchasing individually every month or near enough anyway or picking up “missed” boxes in between orders. So I now have my subscription and love the time and distraction it gives me. I’m so glad when I get my dispatch emails and race home to hope I’ve not been left a parcel card and can open it on the day!

This month, it was all about the #selfcaresquad and the sloth being its mascot. So tonight, I had a drink out of my sloth mug, and opened the fab little kit from the make arcade (where I plan to purchase a few more kits on payday!) to make my sloth with perfect instructions – made sewing him together easy. I’ve watched numerous episodes of the Gilmore Girls, been blessed enough that my husband got home safe and in a decent time with road closures due to the storm, have food in my belly and had a blissful bath. Now in bed, finishing off this post and thinking about journeying to the land of nod.

21.2.2017 – Postcrossing

For my own wellbeing, I’ve re-started postcrossing. The last time I did it I was about 19/20 and did it to distract myself whilst at university. I had forgotten about the account and have since re-started again which unfortunately for me, means I have to re-built the number of cards I’m allowed travelling again but fortunately means it’s less to spend on my pocket every now and again!

Anyway for those not familiar – you sign up to Postcrossing.com  and register your personal details onto their database. You can choose to send a card to someone in the database, which is chosen at random. Each postcard is given an identification number to develop a recognition system. You then try to either pick a card in your own “stash” to send them from their mini-biography. It then relies on you posting it with the correct amount of postage.

The recipient then registers it and is able to thank you for your card and others can like the designs and comment on them too.

It’s so nice to come home to happy post instead of boring bills and mundane household things. Like today, I had a lovely postcard from a kind lady in Belarus! =) It might cost a few pence more and to some, it might seem pointless but it’s bringing me some joy so I’m going to keep doing it as long as it continues to do so!

11.2.17 – Alphabet Dating – V


Thanks to the curse that is teaching, my time off is occasionally without my husband for large chunks of it. So I thought to tick off another alphabet date – I’d book something to signify our 6 month wedded bliss anniversary and Valentine’s Day.

I’d been recommended Bedford Lodge Hotel and Spa in Newmarket and so far, it hasn’t disappointed! 

We checked in slightly early and flopped into our room to veg after having lunch in Newmarket… we headed down to the pool, jacuzzi, steam room and sauna to spend an hour or so. Now we are back in the room to watch the rugby before heading downstairs to “Squires” restaurant for a meal and exchanging presents. 

A lovely start to my half term! 

8.2.2017 – 6 Months in…

 

We’ve made it to 6 months in without killing each other.

I’m SO thankful I found Mr M when I did and that I’ve had his support for four and a half years.

I’m not going to sit here and gush reems and reems about him, although I could. I don’t want him to think he doesn’t have to spoil me anymore! But he’s truly is my rock and I can’t wait for more adventures as Husband and Wife.

All photos are posted and credited, thanks to Sarah Swift Photography, who amazingly and professionally created the beautiful memories we have of our day.

4.2.2017 – Alphabet Dating – P

Pub and Penta Hotel, Ipswich

I haven’t written about any of these in a while – our last intentional Alphabet Date was way back November so the hubby and I have been slacking.

We spent this weekend in a slightly unusual manner – in that, we stayed in a hotel in our home town. As part of the eternal punishment of supporting our local side of Ipswich Town, the husband and a number of his friends have season tickets to grace Portman Road. One of our closest “couple” friends travel from Oxford to watch and occassionally stay overnight before heading home. As a result, we tend to meet them in the hotel bar, clock-watch making sure we get the last bus home or book a cab early enough on a Saturday night. So … from a random idea on a dark, gloomy Boxing Day – we booked a room for a hotel sleepover.

We headed to the Greyhound, an amazing Adnams pub for lunch – I decided shopping was more appealing than football so we met afterwards, headed to the hotel; chilled out in our rooms before eating in at the hotel and then starting a phenominally dedicated and long game of Cards Against Humanity interspursed by a photo shoot imitating dodgy 90’s boyband music videos and other friends, who randomly were popping in … meant all in all – we had an epic day / evening.

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